life of f-asH-ION loveR

Am I

2010-09-08T00:37:00.002+08:00

Salam,

Its been 4 days of Eid holiday, and i have spent my time at my strangered home.

It looks different,(after the renovation)

it feels different,

it's not the same,

It's my home.

I have come back and listen for hours on problems.

everything is so sad

everything is so tensed

everything is so...

it is a stressful life, when u think about it, it became more and more stressful. sometimes letting go is the best measure. everyone is growing one after another with their phase and problems. some very rebellious, some grown but never matures.

WHY ME? why I have to think, isnt it enough what i have done? yes i am tired. but something that always keep me going, if its not me who else? if its not me,she cant take it.

But, I have my life. I dream high above. Too high that might be one day i have to leave them for awhile.

But can they be ok?

would they ever understand?

I am like a Father now, though I always been. whenever im feeling very low, I know that Allah bring this up to grow me up in one or another way.

I pray and pray and pray "Allah, lessen the burden for her, lessen the burden for her, lessen the burden for her, lessen the burden for my siblings, open up their mind and heart, and God give me strength"

Years after years, everything is getting old. That old lady, down there "Allah give her health and happiness, and let her be with us"

because without her, I dnt know if i could.

hungry ghost

2010-08-29T13:04:00.001+08:00

in love with the hunger

me as the dish

2010-08-23T03:34:00.003+08:00

bored.

started and ending

2010-08-12T23:44:00.007+08:00

"how it begins"

In a blink of an eye, everything move forward.

leaving those behind.

"the team of my campaign"

its already been 2 years me in studying in Melaka, it has change me so much.

been 7 months since Baba left us : (

also change me.

"love you guys weyh"

i am very reluctant as i always be, its my nature. it never change until one sweet call that god have create a path for me, and that path really thought the real meaning of being somebody.

that call is being a high Committee for my Faculty club, the loved KOMED.

it started when i was in semester 3, i was elected

when asked by Madam Wan "why you want to be in KOMED?"

"how it end"

Honestly i answer, "i want to find something to love and to hold on in Melaka."

well KOMED does that to me a lot, i put out everything on hold just because of KOMED,

i stay on weekends, make people see me as a good boy:P, and make a fashion lover like me dull and boring because i have to show them proper way of dressing.

even my family in the moment after my dad left i still cling on KOMED and dint let anything go on it. i gave my commitment to this.

HEY I ALSO PUT OUT INVITATIONS TO FASHION SHOWS FOR KOMED!

OMG=(

guess what my year with KOMED is over, we had our new commitee line up. and me; is back to the normal track of a student.

I am really glad i was given the opportunity to be in KOMED, to work with other amazing committee, to feel the challenge, and to be it.

Trust me its all sweat and tears, tensed!

NOT ABOUT POPULARITY!

its great weyh, just to let this go its like letting go something really big out of my life. i am now more free and clueless- like the normal kid felt. yeay.

wow never thought, but i did it, we did it. congratulations KOMED 2009/2010.

how does it go?

2010-06-13T21:38:00.004+08:00

its been 1 month plus since semester end and i havent wrap up a post about semester 4 in lendu.

how does time go so fast.

seems to me it was like last semester i attend my MMS week, and now, im one of the senior in charge. wow.

everything is going too fast.

after quite a wake up call of my dad departure, i have lots in mind

between family-passion- dreams-fashion-fashion- education- siblings

everything intertwined in my head.

semester 4 been a very relax semester, subjects i hve taken are:

publishing

publication

broadcasting

economics

advertising

issues in modern Malaysia

different environment with different lectures it gives me more challenges to cater them. we have to do a booklet, go to publishing house, study more theory, report after report and god its done

during exams i was so scared of Advertising and broadcasting.

so the result is out. again alhamdullilah, i got into deans list. best pointer in my record. hope i could keep it up next semester. i got one b+ , which is broadcasting. told ya kids, im not broadcasting people!

thank you lectures, Ms Syida, Ms zuliani, Ms Linda, Ms Maizura Mansor, and Ms Maizura. thank you friends, teammates, classmates, mother, and everyone. and juniors:D

THANK YOU LOVE

today

2010-06-08T00:10:00.000+08:00

its my birthday.

oh.

Daulat Tuanku

2010-06-05T21:34:00.000+08:00

long live Sultan and Permaisuri Agong

may Malaysia live in peace and harmony under his ruling

and may Allah bless and guide him.

thinking

2010-06-04T00:18:00.003+08:00

after a while of observing and getting close to fashion industry. i realize

"It is really important to know fashion as a whole, not just but what you think it is."

it's like reading all Vogue Mag, Hanger mag, the stariolist blog.

these are different perspective of fashion, non is better than another. everything is great.

PenaNg:D

2010-05-29T23:03:00.010+08:00

so yup again u got it right, this holiday i went to Penang again,exactly one year after last year's visit. and Omg it was awesome:D, i mean the food:)

me and bell at the wedding:)

the newly weds with mak norma and pak zain

so congratulations much and lots of love to the newly wed:D

well the exact reason we- me, Jazeli Norsalahe and Nabila Anizam; plan to go Penag actually because we were invited to Razaleigh's sister wedding kak Julia and U'sher. on the ? erk i cant remember but the trip was 15 may -19 may? i guess.

Jazeli

bell

razaleigh

faizah

oh my1, me:)

So basically what else can u do in Penang beside eat and enjoy the beach and cheap parking fees. haha so cool la. u know the idea u are living on island. hahahah but scary too. surrounded by water :D

So not many picture of people taken just the food bebh yeah the food:) god!

The lord nasi kandar beratur:D

The queen, Mee Pata, padang kota.

roti canai Kambing jalan Anglican

Mua Chi, gurney drive

nasi padang:D

sweet sour fish with rice at sunset bistro- amazing:)

and i promise to be vegetarian after Penang. and im still trying:P its hard when we are surrounded with meat eater and you yourself was a meat eater. crazy.

cendol

fish and prawns

banana split sunset bistro

tuna sandwich

air tingkap/window drink

cucur yang tak sedap.kata famous:P

btw penang was really fun thank you Jazeli, Razaleigh and his friends, Faizah:), bell and all the restaurant erk stalls i ve been too, Penangrians and others:) thanx for the trip.

theres always next time for penanG! Wink wink*

thanks friends.

bday

2010-05-26T00:23:00.001+08:00

Arwah Abdul Rahman Senin

my dad. another great gemini

i would come to him hug him and kiss him and wish him happy birthday:)

happy birthday ba :)

guideline to a funeral

2010-05-24T20:53:00.002+08:00

why im doing this?

hurm, u know i have lots thoughts and thinking all the way.

and sadly today my uncle mother in law passed away at 63. she passed away this morning, so i company my mum to the funeral. well it took my whole day today so i have lots of thoughts on this, watching people.

these are guidelines for the family member affected by the death:

-wear something decent. dnt wear your kurong with ur pink-rm 10-bra showing off.

-wear dull/plain color. Black or white never red

-inform others. so others can prepare the house for you

-for relative that is not really affected/pretending to be/remembering your own affected death please help to prepare the house, the food, the drinks for visitors. its sunnah.

- u know what to do first "grab the yaasin or zikrullah" for the dead

-its a sad moment, so cry, but as a Muslim we shouldn't cry much we should be strong and pray for the death. Remember only the prayers of the son and daughter will really go through to help the dead on the life after=)

for visitors:

-wear something decent.

-wear dull color. this morning i saw someone wore red, its that red.Omg. respect

-this is not an eid celebration, so, u wont be fed with all this fancy cookies or candy, so dnt come bugging say u hungry or finding a food in the dead house. OMG rude.

-i read once " visitors to the dead's House must lessen the burden of the affected members, by preparing yourself with all the need"

-which means make sure u eat first, bring your own drinking water(its going to be hot), your own yaasin.

- be prepared of anything and ready to lend a hand- Omg this one, this morning at the grave yard, when they want bury the dead my uncle hand me the cangkul and with wet ground, seriously i couldnt do much, i have not eat the whole day and he hand me the cangkul. aiyoo

- your prayers are much appreciated than your umpatan makciks

-dont over laugh, respect please

actually all these are just some general ethics that i think is proper for us to attend a funeral especially a muslim funeral. for fashion people wear black and shades.

not dull color with all these fancy accessories, again its not a clebration.

but what important is the act of visiting the affected family is a sunnat muakkat. means its really important in islam. seriously u will know how important it is when u go through one. its also important as we could look to ourself; are we prepared to face death?

so go.

p/s: this post is only my thoughts, for futher ethics u can always search on trusted sites. these are only my thoughts.

Wiser i thought?

2010-05-20T23:18:00.002+08:00

what on your mind?
hahahha what's really in my mind is this
"if the world going to end soon, why i keep dreaming of an adult life"

its very disturbing to think about this.
its obvious that the world no longer can sustain us. we are bunch of destroyer, greedy and selfish creatures, destroying the nature and destroying the world of future generations

the choices now are:
a) continue life and moving towards your dream
b) forget ur dream and live your life to the fullest

haish. my real dream is to be a very important person in fashion industry, knowledgeable about fashion, media mogul and important figure.

right now, what i really hold on is from the quotes/hadis of our beloved prophet Muhammad,
i cant find the exact words. but i remeber its stated something like " even when you hear the warning(sangkakala) of the judgment day, and u have a seed on your hand. plant it!"

its is clear that he want us to live life, catch your dreams and be faithful to Allah.
how wonderful Islam can be.

thought

2010-05-07T16:29:00.003+08:00

wow.
it takes much for me to really release this one.

i sign to lookbook about 2 months ago and its great i can see people from all over the world dressing up. i have been analyzing the looks form people and pattern of dressing up. who am i? hahhaha thats why, it just a thought after seeing a pattern of looks in look book..

trend vs. style?
which are more important?
i vote for style.
people nowadays are too prone to trend that they look less themselves and obviously the chemistry between the individual and the outfit does not match.

i go through hundreds of pictures there only few have the style. well apparently im still searching hahahhah
and and

picture vs fashion vs look?
which to be judge? i've seen so many bad picture but great fashionnot recognise. i've seen pretty/handsome individual posting their look more than the fashion elements.

well it just a thought, from a lover from land far far away. Malaysia.

unlock

2010-05-05T22:43:00.002+08:00

u knock a lock door constantly,
open the door,
yet there no more me.

u want fun, when u had one,
u want me and
u are making fun

u make me adored.
now whats next?

big HAHA

2010-05-01T01:17:00.003+08:00

i am so happy but i dont think i should
omg but whatever,
u know i never like you before, because of ur smelly met busuk face
and u ever growing online influence generating.

just glad that u get caught on hand.
u are disgrace of your own pride.
u are disgrace to your own act.

u are trying to left
minang gurl, and be damansara girls.

nahhhhhh thats ok, u still have ur hot friends, and im sure u will find ur cover up story for that disgrace u made urself.
probably "i dont know it was there" "it was a set up"
yeah right baby.

next time baby,
try harder, i know u can.
and baby i think u need 1 size up on all ur clothes.
well if u really want to be looking like damansara girls and not like 60cent donut of lendu.

stay hot bitches.

the world

2010-04-29T21:57:00.002+08:00

we are showcased by choices, each with its pros and cons.
none is perfect.

we are born with feelings, each make us complete,
none is ultimate.

we was planned.

another half

2010-04-26T08:36:00.004+08:00

exam week created lot of tense
and the stupid driving lesson too.
hurm i hope everything end very fast.publishing was good. i hope the miss syieda felt the same too when marking my paper.
after the paper, me and my soon-to-be housemate, went to our rent house weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewe got the house yeah, we will be living in Lendu Bakti next semester yea yea.later i went to Dataran Pahlawan, to watch shutter island, according to ekin "a very good movie"
indeed kan. :P
and i met Jaclyn Victor yaw.
my another half. Hahahaha
she so amazing, this is my third time listen to her singing Live and its amazing.
apparently only me and dhiya know her song.
while the rest of KG.COM.MY crowd was super-massive black hole.

its so fun la. and later we went to Jusco to pee. later to Kota Laksmana Asam Pedas. weeeeeeee what a day:))
thanx friends.

Across the sea

2010-04-21T21:11:00.002+08:00

across the sea,
across my heart,
from thus we felt apart.

from hair it begins,
to hair it differs,
to music it change
and now we will never begin.

CRITICS

2010-04-18T13:59:00.005+08:00

sometimes i say things that make people think

" OMG is he soooo damm good, that he can actually speak that way"

i do have that thoughts in mind too:)but i dont know, i am not perfect so do others.i appreciate people who are trying to be.
its in Gemini characteristic that they always think, and plus my big mouth, i keep talking about things that i think about.
rationality is my main thoughts.
however I am sorry if ever one of my word hurt any of u guys who have contact with me.

btw last week was my grandmother birthday celebration, Nek Ru, Rubiah Ahmad a great lady and i love her so much:))

everyone was there, its the first appearance after my dad's passed away:(
it felt different, he always the one with camera capturing relatives. but now its my turn.
he kinda have a feel about it,
before he left, 2 days before we have a function at home, and he keep asking me to capture photos, but i refuse:P sorry ba.

yup everything is good.
but we miss you baba.

hey

2010-04-16T01:48:00.002+08:00

people are out and about regardless their status.
they change their statuses and doesn't care about what people might think.
hurmm and please grow up.
u dah grown up kot membesar la,

and btw im the biggest and the most durable plastic face:)
so thanks.

out of mainstream

maxxie me

2010-04-11T22:21:00.000+08:00

Tony you

:)

faculty

2010-04-04T23:13:00.002+08:00

I love fashion,
I love what i belong too,
I love my faculty.

only once i mentioned a real disgrace to masscomites, which he is. stupid blogger boy.
i try to support each events by the faculty from my days as junior and now me as the people who is behind the events. as a high committee.

i am very demonstrated by the recent event, a very big event but not a big heart to support it.
dont blame us KOMED.
an event is success by the crowd and the crowd is yet selfish .

"people want us to come to their event, but they dint come to ours"

you guys are the greatest.
Thank You.

HELLO

2010-04-02T12:11:00.002+08:00

I deleted my Facebook.

because i think it provoke to many drama
blog, lookbook, and myspace my only account. Bye people:((

sharing

2010-03-14T17:36:00.003+08:00

standing, bowing, kneeling, prostrating. At every point, I become smaller, smaller and smaller.

“reminding myself that I am nothing.”

“And God, is everything.”

Yasmin Ahmad

the greatest, the most gracious Allah swt.

when i am lost and confuse,

connecting with Allah is the best.

COLOR

2010-03-08T11:50:00.003+08:00

COLOR ON ME..
well recently i was teased by one of my long-should-die-aquin. yes aquin not friend.
hurm he was condaming on my fashion color.
sometimes people are so naive to follow the guideline set by stylista which is ok, but its not when u try to follow 1970's stylista..
apparently he said, "its so funny to see you as dark skin wear bright color"
I was like boy, u got to go.. his ugly and stupid and yet try to be on the guideline, but apparently he wasnt. duh his mind is too shallow to think and to be one. stop dreaming small lizard u aint going nowhere accept on the street selling what left inside u..
loose men.

till next time bitches:D

A DAY

2010-02-28T16:09:00.005+08:00

that shirt i bought 4 years ago hahahahhaha

so after a forcing come back from my mum to getback to kl, i decided to bail on my license class on sat and just take a weekend off at KL. the so called Aqiqah Kenduri of my cousin which they decide to do it at my house for an obvious reason they dont want troublesome themselves..daaaaaaa better trouble people with teh mess what... kannnnnn???? was oOOOoookey...

hurm so teh only day i can be out to capture some fashion is on sat, i texted qilla, but her leg was bruised because some sort of accident at work hurmm, miss her tho... so i hang with the rest thira and nay, and dayang, we met zie, faiz, leplep, and iqa once we reach Pyramid, well that was fun =D

The main reason we are out is for gedik2 at a bazzar at sunway pyramid but apparently the bazaar canceled last minute.so we make a move to subang parade for just another palin boring bazaar, but ok la, i bought few tee and a belt...errr RM 100 spent..and yeah i met Fara Fauzana :D I dnt know why im so excited, hahah she was fine, but i was serious, when i first saw her i was like is that fara? and i take a glance at her thighs and i am like " ummm hummm yeah sure!" hahahahah
well before taht we had our lunch at carls Jr. which is ultimate orgasm OMG!arghh why la we have kak Odah here, they should replace that with carls!

am i happy? well thats just something to make me forget stuffs for a while..hurm just roll someone in, Then may be im ok.. god whats up with my mood flinging around haish.

YES

2010-02-26T15:16:00.001+08:00

I just want to be somebody's everything.

You say I've seen too many movies, watched too much TV,
Read too many fairy tales that I live and make believe.
You say the kind of love I'm dreamin' of does not exist.
And there's no one like I'm searchin' for, well, I believe there is.

And I want someone to come alive when they lay eyes on me,
Have a lust within their touch, a passion fire beyond belief.
Reality and fantasy should be one in the same
And I want to be somebody's everything.

I refuse to settle for something less than great.
And if it takes a lifetime, then that's how long I'll wait.
'Cause all I want is everything, is that too much to ask?
Have romance, love and passion; find magic that will last.

And I want someone to think they'll die if they can't be with me.
I want to be their joy, their pride, their dreams,
The very air they breathe.
I want to wake up feelin' loved and go to bed the same.
Yes, I want to be somebody's everything, somebody's everything.

Oh, I want someone to come alive when they lay eyes on me.
Have a lust within their touch, a passion fire beyond belief.
I'd love to wake up feelin' loved and go to bed the same.
Yes, I want to be somebody's everything.

Someone to hold me close and tremble when the lovin's done.
Think it's heaven, call me angel, think I hung the moon and sun.
Get misty eyed just knowin' with a love song people sing.
Yes, I want to be somebody's everything.
And I'm gonna be somebody's everything,
somebody's everything.

Yes I want to be, I'm gonna be somebody's everything

2010-02-21T20:49:00.001+08:00

its been a while, actually i never really express my feelings in blog that much anymore..hurmm

u know what this feeling is fuck up..so.

fuck it!

u.

2010-02-21T00:46:00.001+08:00

I CANT BELIVE I BELIEVED
EVERYTHING WE HAD WOULD LAST
SO YOUNG AND NAIVE FOR ME TO THINK
SHE WAS FROM YOUR PAST
SILLY OF ME TO DREAM OF
ONE DAY HAVING YOUR KIDS
LOVE IS SO BLIND
IT FEELS RIGHT WHEN ITS WRONG

I CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR YOUR SCHEMES
I'M SMARTER THAN THAT
SO DUMB AND NAIVE TO BELIEVE THAT
WITH ME YOU'RE A CHANGED MAN
FOOLISH OF ME TO COMPETE
WHEN YOU CHEAT WITH LOOSE WOMEN
IT TOOK ME SOME TIME BUT NOW I'VE MOVED ON, BECAUSE I REALIZED I GOT…

(CHORUS) Harmonized

ME, MYSELF AND I
THAT'S ALL I GOT IN THE END
THAT'S WHAT I FOUND OUT
AND IT AINT NO NEED TO CRY
I TOOK A VOW THAT FROM NOW ON
I'M GON'NA BE MY OWN BEST FRIEND

ME, MYSELF AND I
THATS ALL I GOT IN THE END
THATS WHAT I FOUND OUT
AND IT AINT NO NEED TO CRY
I TOOK A VOW THAT FROM NOW ON
I'M GON'NA BE MY OWN BEST FRIEND

(VERSE 2)
CONTROLLING, YOU SAY THAT YOU LOVE ME
BUT YOU DONT
YOUR FAMILY TOLD ME ONE DAY
I WOULD SEE IT ON MY OWN
NEXT THING I KNOW I'M DEALING
WITH YOUR THREE KIDS IN MY HOME
LOVE IS SO BLIND IT FEELS RIGHT WHEN ITS WRONG

NOW THAT ITS OVER
STOP CALLING ME
COME PICK UP YO CLOTHING
NO NEED TO FRONT LIKE YA STILL WIT ME
ALL YOUR HOMIES KNOW
EVEN YOUR VERY BEST FRIEND
TRIED TO WARN ME ON THE LOW
IT TOOK ME SOME TIME
BUT NOW I AM STRONG, BECAUSE I REALIED I'VE GOT……

REPEAT CHORUS

BRIDGE (BROKEN IN TWO PARTS)

I GOT ME, MYSELF AND I
I KNOW THAT I WILL NEVER DISAPOINT MYSELF
My eyes HAVE CRIED A THOUSAND TIMES
ALL THE LADIES IF YOU FEEL ME HELP ME SING IT OUT
I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU
YEAH YOU HURT ME BUT I LEARNED A LOT ALONG THE WAY
IT'S HOW I LEARNED TO MAKE IT THROUGH
AFTER ALL THE RAIN YOU SEE THE SUN COME OUT AGAIN

NOW I'VE GOT ME, MYSELF AND I
YEAH, I KNOW THAT I WILL NEVER DISAPOINT MYSELF
My eyes HAVE CRIED A THOUSAND TIMES
I'VE CRIED, ALL THE LADIES IF YOU FEEL ME HELP ME SING IT OUT
I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU
YEAH YOU HURT ME BUT I LEARNED A LOT ALONG THE WAY
IT'S HOW I LEARNED TO MAKE IT THROUGH
AFTER ALL THE RAIN YOU'LL SEE THE SUN COME OUT AGAIN, YEAH-AH-EE

(OH OH OH OOH OOH OOOH OOOH OOOOH OOOOH OOOOOH OOOOOH OOOOOH OOOOOOH OOOOOOH UHOOO UHOOO YEAH AH)

I GOT ME, MYSELF AND I
ME, MYSELF AND I
MY eyes HAVE CRIED A THOUSAND TIMES
I HAVE CRIED SO MANY TIMES
I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU
I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU
IT'S HOW I LEARNED TO MAKE IT THROUGH
AFTER ALL THE RAIN YOU'LL SEE THE SUN COME OUT AGAIN!

I GOT ME, MYSELF AND I
I KNOW THAT I WILL NEVER DISAPOINT MYSELF
MY eyes HAVE CRIED A THOUSAND TIMES
IF YOU'VE CRY A THOUSAND TIMES, LADIES YOU WILL SURVIVE
I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU
YEAH YOU HURT ME BUT I LEARNED A LOT ALONG THE WAY
IT'S HOW I LEARNED TO MAKE IT THROUGH
I CAN SEE THE SUN SHINE, I'VE GOT ME, MYSELF AND I

out with them

2010-02-20T01:13:00.005+08:00

her

him

others:)

photo by:Ashman Mahfudz

its

2010-02-17T03:11:00.001+08:00

its not just me, its almost everyone

so..?

red team

2010-02-08T12:25:00.005+08:00

recently mascommites was invited to celebrate our prime minister coming to the KBM..

so here some of the pictures

i ve been really busy lately, event after event feelings after feelings. sometimes it hurt to be like this. its been two years tho, god what have i done to get one haish....

ydp bday

2010-01-31T20:28:00.002+08:00

hahahaha happy birthday Nurdhiya Aizat!
this picture was taken early last semester and hiss 1 size smaller!

God Bless and Good Luck.

KOMED LA

2010-01-24T00:45:00.003+08:00

the new line up of komed!:)

waa i love the pic of me...
and others off course!!!erkkk

good luck guys!

his words

2010-01-20T18:24:00.006+08:00

" Lyn, Ini semua perjanjian kita dengan Allah, sampai masa kita semua akan pergi, i love u so much"

" I maafkan you, and i redha kan you lyn"

my dad last words to my mum......

today 20th January, it remark 1 month of life without him..

loosing him is loosing a strength to the family, my siblings and me..
ya ALLAH give us strength and cherish him and us with blessing as well as all the Muslims.

MISS ME

2010-01-20T09:49:00.001+08:00

miss Agnyss dean

wawawaa...... can someone do a caricutur of me?

me and you

2010-01-06T12:19:00.005+08:00

hey hey:)
Ashman Mahfudz posing for a very long long time..

btw these are some pic taken on 1st january 2010.. new hair, insyallah better me:)

photo by razalaeigh zain and nay aznam.

yes the world is still spinning:)

bday raz

2010-01-01T19:27:00.002+08:00

happy 20th birthday raz!

and happy new year people

photo by nay nay

2009

2009-12-31T18:30:00.004+08:00

i would like to describe it from the ending,

my dad, abdul rahman senin mostly known as amigo the star newspaper photographer, pass away on 20th December 2009.
yes its a sad ending of the year we never thought, but allah the most gracious knew it better.

he had complained of chest pain on that night, and we bring him to the hospital and his gone.
it happen so fast, very fast...
but i know, despite his early crazy life, at the end he really became good for the world and the life after.. . alhamdulilah..

because of that, i am more worried about us, my mum and other younger siblings, growing up without that figure.. pray for us family yeah:)

2009 been a year of studying for me, most of the months im in campus, and i dint have much enjoyment for my self....financialy was hell crazy for me..love? huh? love?
hahahh

got my slr, my baby... glad that i have my own camera..
fashionly? hahahah its been a great year, with few invitations thank you...
and kl scene getting better best nye...cant stop smiling when im out there
2009 start very well, drama was fun...birthday??? hey what did i do? oh ma god!!! hahahha my cousin wedding and im helping out with the dishes, and my cousin said hey u too hot to clear the dishes la...hahahhaha
sorry la i have my plan later that day!hahaha
much of 2009 nine wish came true. alhamdulilah...

i really hope 2010, is a better year for everything, us, and the enviroment..especially the earth!!!

happy new year people

contradict

2009-12-26T23:59:00.000+08:00

hey people,
been not a really good weeks for me,
i will explain later.when i am strong enough...

anyways, happy holiday & happy new year 2010
my it be a better year for the us and everything around us, and the planet earth..

after what happen i dint really expect much to happen this 2010

sunny Christmas,

uniquely malaysia:D

HIS show,:)

2009-12-19T00:26:00.003+08:00

so as i told before that his show is coming, and he invited me, and then i choose to be a part of the media...i choose to because to feel the vibe and the heat to be one hahahhaha and also for my www.f-ash.blogspot.com
its great, to have him arround and welcoming me:)

the show over all was good, the collection was sooooooooooo carven ong, for those who know, the lighting and the pr effort have room for improvements, huge spacey room...
hhahaha

i dnt have full pic of what im wearing that day, basically black agaiinst white and some gray shades at my shawl, and lether bag, and leather shoes,
i bail on being leatherly white theme, because my mum nad my sister apparantly took my stuffs and dint give it back so i dnt have it that day to wear it
which is really sad...

but whatever thanx dear...

coming out

2009-12-08T20:42:00.001+08:00

hey people,
nice to see you guys here again,
so here are some update about myself:

early December i got in to TNS international, a marketing research company as a data entry, i take it because of the money as i really need it to get my closet fix. it's boring job and unfortunately less fashion.. but whatever...i still LOVE fashion.

and another sad news, my slr broke down, and i dnt know why, it is very sad to me, as i really love it:( it cant start.so it really make me shock and really sad.. once when i dnt hve a camera i dnt mind , but after having it, and loosing it, its really sad...my www.f-ash.blogspot.com blog, must be hungry in few weeks, if i dint get back my cmera soon..

i only can see people style out there but not capturing it...its avery mood downpour for me this month...

and to make it worse carven ong show, is just arround the corner

so my results for last semester is out..my points drop, and certain subject gred really disappoint me.. anyway alhamdulilah, i got into deans list again, and yeah, i know how to work better for myself next semester..thank you lectures and groupmates and friends who done great for urself kn?

congratulations.

sorry to whom i ignored due to certain circumstances. i need a get away

the qurban

2009-11-29T18:58:00.004+08:00

qurban done for arwah datuk din, and datuk saharom, nek aesah and nek rubiah

the process:

the spectators:)

and me photographer, and good eater:)

542 km

2009-11-29T11:25:00.009+08:00

hye people, selamat hari raya aidil adha and happy holidays.. this year my family decide-pratically my mum did, to celbrate and holiday in terrenganu or kuala terrenganu which is 542KM or 7 hour drive...hahaha well it took longer time for us to arrive cz my uncle want to stop and stop...hurmmm

so we went on wedenesday, and reached arroun 7.30pm.. and we satyed one night at my uncle's house at KT. the next day we check in our resort...

we stop at kuantan, teluk cempedak before we continue our journey to KT, here some of the photos that i took..

jet and lala

the scene of teluk cempedak

muhammad:)

amazing gorgeous bella bell

nana, lala and jet

bella bell

the family accept me:(
photogrpher kn...

seeing the number of my family, u know why we choose to drive, not flight.huhuhuh

so we try to jump and jump and jump so my father could take my picture..at least not me taking it...hahahahh and btw swimming is our main activity besides sleeping and plants vs. zombie-ing

KT wave was very strong, none are allowed in.. too bad..

its fun a family moment la, im just trying to suck in anything...:)
will continue on next post abou my grandmother qurban, this cow is going to be the qurban.

3rd finish

2009-11-15T22:52:00.002+08:00

hey hey peop, so semester 3 have ended! yeay yeay yeay.... it was way better than last 2 semester in term of the chaos and drama, this semester bring up a more 'couldnt be bothered' drama. the studies was so hactic. i think i did not perform well in some subject such Graphic, Bel, and psychology well that base on my on going assesment marks...
the other was great.

thank you Miss Fatimah Yazmin, mr Hakimi Tew, Mr. Rusydi, Madam shiela, Madam Ashmalia, ustazah Noraini, and Miss Rossalynn Ismail fro teaching us this semester, its been a great journey...

and friends:)
Thank you for being with me. thank you. greatness achieved!
komed! great, im glad im in the community. it was great handling stuff and meetings. was great. i love komed. indeed when the first time i heard the offer to a fast track program, the first thing i think about is komed. im still thinking. NYDP once said to me: ' if u think about komed, how far can komed brings u?' i said ' right'..

about the fast track, I am still considering. those status in fb are just a statement to see peop feedback on my decisson to go. skip the hardship of degree. i know its hard, but i know i can do it. i am thinking more about other stuff taht i will be facing if i decided to go. hurmmm..

naimah aznam, dyg atul, dhiya aizat, razaleigh zain, amzar-lovers:)
DMC 3C- in case u guys dint know, our class is over the top (rossalynn ismail,2009)
komed- great team!
juniors- errrrr behave yeah.hahahahha
masscomites- i am so proud to be one

:) yeay hols!

MIFW- its a rap

2009-11-09T01:01:00.002+08:00

amazing shows..i am very proud to witness it, and with courtesy to enjoy the show...like i quoted"

"its so amazing how something suck up your energy but u still able to smile:)...fashion. MiFW Was great"

congratulations to mifa, shelby yap, BDA, designers, gorgeous crews, and amazing fashionista from malaysia and over the world for suporting the industry.. and SOME amazing MODELS.(some je), congratulations:)
u guys deserve warmest tribute to cater us the show:)

its been 3 days me following the event and shows. its great and i need time to update about the shows and pictures because im having my examination week now wish me luck:)

for more info follow update at f-ash.blogspot.com capturing fashion.

REVIEWS

2009-11-07T09:24:00.003+08:00

papadom!

hahaha filem ni best, i dnt know i just like it, its sad, its happy its loving all in one!!!
4 star

this is it!!!

mj, a lover, this movie/docu is only will be enjoyed by someone who really love MJ, people who dont might see it as boring and slow docu.
i cried, i always do when it comes to him:)

do it for love, l-o-v-e.
4.5star

pisau cukur

thanxx juma for making me watch this movie.
it was good, funny and stupid..
maya look very dumb and fazura over shadow everything,
featuring young hot celebrity which is good:)
3.9 star

just a day

2009-10-26T02:50:00.004+08:00

happy birthday Na'imah Aznam:)
on 26th october 2009

i cant go to you,
but u come to me,
i cant buy u a cake,
but i can bake u one,

i can hurt feelings,
but people need it sometimes.

you can be crazy sometimes,
But after all we all are crazy.
all the time

happy birthday :)

little skinny

2009-10-24T20:27:00.008+08:00

hurm i always be the bitch who count how many potato chips u eat, how many slice of cake u eat, try to stop u to order food... u know.
well basically in mahfudz and mahfudzah we were raised with critics by each other...
'hey u getting fatter'
'omg u dint fit that jeans?'
'arent you shy?'
' look at that lady!(pointing at a makcik outside the car) u wannt to be like her?'
'its not im mean, but poor if u guys become like that'-mama

hahahahha

hahhaha yup it happen...
my mum always observe our weight.
its ok when you are skinnier but its not when u are gettinng fatter..
but i dnt understand my sister that turning to big mama soon ahhahahahahah

well it was normal until my little sister say this word
4year old:'im not eating,'
me:'why'?
4 year old:'because if i eat im going to be fat and not beautiful'

yup a little too skinny:0

sorry for faculty

2009-10-22T23:15:00.002+08:00

it is crazy this semester.
first and foremost,
i would like to apologies about the food for raya dinner and deans list award.
it was good wasn't it????
i would like to say sorry because the food finish, it is enough just it finish earlier.
and when we eat we really hope that you guys enjoy the show and food without knowing that the food might have something wrong...

we order the food from the usual caterer that always done business with uitm students, so we have trust and with hope we hold to it.
this problem was out of our control.
we take this into account to next time really ensure the quality of the food.
komed are very sory.
we will try our best to avoid this in the future.

next, is about mass comm shirt for the juniors.
i passed the list of the name ordered before raya to the lecture in charge.
i thought and hope that the shirt will be ready in 2 weeks after Raya.but it dosent.

i hardly belief the responsible of doing this supposedly done by the one who took the money/order.
it make the process easier and right.

but what ever it is it is now done, and the lecture in charge confirmed that the shirt be ready by next Monday.
me and few of komed members will be waiting outside dewan bendahara on Wednesday morning after part1 BEL120 PAPER, for juniors to claim their shirts.

again im sorry for any inconvenieces may occur due to this delayed.

RAYA DINNER

2009-10-19T18:36:00.001+08:00

baby baby baby so cute!!!!
hahahha thats what in my mind...
before pregnancy worried, that our baby could be disable, sick or what not.
but it turn out on 18th october 2009 aka 29th syawal 1446? ekkk?????

our baby!!!!
Komed first event after Dhiya took over on august 09.
our baby; Glamour raya dinner and deans list award.!!!!

it was a hard work from the members of komed.
i would like to thank other komed members if there is something lacking in me to help out this event. i try my best.
thank you to the komed's seketeriat.
thank you lectures for coming.
thank you Mr. Rauf
thank you advisors-Mr Hanafi and Madam Wan.

the dinner was a success....

last but not least, all masscomites comunity and other comunity?? that attend the event. we are overwhelmed.

lets

2009-10-10T10:36:00.002+08:00

jom jom jom ke AG.!!!
hahahha great benchmark for mass commm..
so proud.
good luck seniors...and sure we will have fun.,

the GALLERY OCT '09

2009-10-07T02:49:00.005+08:00

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY
A JOURNEY OF EMOTIONS

A PART 3 events
everyone is cordially invited to the gallery at
galeri b, faculty of art and design building,
10.30am-4.30pm

unlock the journey !

im the emcee for the opening ceremony:0

photo credit to azief, thank you

raya

2009-09-27T00:07:00.002+08:00

it was so much fun!
tremendous picture were taken by me, but i cant upload it here due to connection fuc**** arround lendu

and yeah im back in lendu where work load awaits us.crazy crazy crazy and i dnyt know, all i can say im prepared to face the worse when results out, yup its a unstable semester

i dnt know what to write much,
i just miss someone....
yes i miss u...
u haven't wish me raya,

i just love anna wintour;0

eid mubarak!

2009-09-19T15:31:00.003+08:00

wawawa so this is it, the celebration of victory against lust for the past month,
we loose, 1 or 2 days, or we cant for a week, and we won, and lust lost.
congratulation people...

i am not happy to say this, but i must admit it , i took this lovely month of Ramadan for granted. i dint perform my prayers well, i dint do extra much , i was "busy"? i guess... im just a bit drifted..
it feel so sad to to know that Ramadan is leaving this evening.

hurmm we never know if we ever going to meet ramadan next year.
inyaallah.

so i would like to wish people happy eid mubarak!
forgive for any wrong doing, saying(which is termendous) or act(my bitchiness)
i am sorry, sometimes it happen without me realising it and i am only an ordinary boy.
yes i am still boy!

selamat hari raya!

komed

2009-09-13T11:10:00.002+08:00

after 3times fixing my name, here it is, komed organitation chart:0

31st August!

2009-08-31T00:50:00.008+08:00

hey hey hey malaysian!!!!
long way huh 52 years old, merdeka merdeka merdeka!
unity among races,
take it this way, if u ask people to unite but u, urself criticize other race for being this and that..so u shouldnt ask others to do so... acceptance people!

me hanging the flag at my laundry:0

and happy birthday to me roomate in lendu

muhamad danial sahrudin!

i think

2009-08-28T01:31:00.001+08:00

i like u...
no i seriously do....
hurm then u said something against my vision,
and i was like hurmmm....

i felt like throwing my phone away,
evrytime i check it without u updating it, make me frustrated.
yeah i do....

u r cold as ur name, i keep heating it , to bring it up
hurmm will i suceed?
i hope so,

yes. i like u.

hey hey

2009-08-27T22:37:00.003+08:00

tuttttttttttttttttttttttttttt life is total blast this week its crazy with me trying to fit in the fasting schedule in my routine. as our dining aka canteen aka cafe only open until 3am. so we have to buy our food like around that hour...
that's not the problem, the problem is we might not able to sleep to wait for food...hurm nak sahur lagi kan...
im the type who really eat sahur.. i need my sahur!!!! and my sleep toooooo
:)

btw people, happy fasting.
stay hot.

The post

2009-08-21T23:55:00.005+08:00

so its been a week so the news might not be the news, the story must already spread around...
after our very amazing Annual Grand Meeting " men in black, girl in red" , the new YDP and NYDP for KOMED! are dhiya' aizat and haniz.

congratulation to both!

amazing gorgeous peop:)

and to all other council members, congratulation!
its so funny when im with dhiya, people will greet him congrats and when they look at me they dnt know what to say.hahahhaha what la... hahha say congrats gak la.

so the grand meeting was amazing accept certain things, which is normal, but its real graet:)
some pic yaw...
as i am busy doing things, i cant really pose:0

meeting was held, last monday and we decided our post in the council..
i really aiming for secretary, but dint get it, i was offered "exco kelab dan fakulti"
wish us the new komed luck:o

two

2009-08-18T13:47:00.002+08:00

first
a lovely person,
hotness plus style= total hotness
slang= very f amazing
look= unique
posture= funny cuteness
status=?
potential= i dk
might be just the look

second
one night knowing
tall
very Malay-if u know what i mean
gorgeous unique smile
Malay style
art and performing
sweet
this the spark feeling
potential= i think there is, but still i dk

officially out:0

2009-08-12T00:32:00.003+08:00

its confirm that our masscomites annual grand meeting will be held this weekend...

and i do propose to current komed members to invite our masscomm alumni to join, especially the ex-council of komed. they agree but i dont know how far the effort to invite the seniors...
anyway come la...support ur little2 fish:0 hahahahah

hahaha i already prepared my black shirt but they just mentioned that we have to wear white so im like oookey SHOPPING tp gune bulu la...hahahahh

tmmrw is the election of ydp/nydp komed...do ur work masscommites.

to answer

2009-08-10T19:41:00.005+08:00

i m officially, coming out the closet:)
about my komed council post, for next semester

i would like to thank, madam rozita and mr hanif, for giving me the trust and appoint me and others to join this council:0 i am excited, at the same time scared, its a big responsibility hurmmm..

now they already chose 15 council member, and im one of them. and election for ydp/nydp will be held on 12&13 Augustt. voting process shall be held in the classroom.

so I'm not holding any post yet, and will wait and see after the election, and we the new members will decide who hold which:)
good luck to 15 members, and to all seniors of komed wish us luck:0

me and dhiya were in. most importantly do vote masscomites do ur responsibility, doesn't matter who you vote for.vote for the best:)

Annual Grand Meeting

2009-08-09T23:01:00.003+08:00

AGM MASS COMM 2009
on 16 August 2009
venue: Bendahara Hall
theme: as shown on poster

sorro-seniority

2009-08-06T20:30:00.002+08:00

i am at my point where i need to focus and not care about other thing.
but i guess some just getting my nerve off...
well its start off okay with them, but there were misunderstanding

(dnt know what in their marine language i think its kekwat)

i have to tell this, i am a self centered person and a total bitch.. that was sometimes... so i might not like this like that and i might just like MYSELF...
so telling in my face snobbish just because i dint say hi to u when i was a junior might not be necessarily a must...or u might say adoring u and staying under ur wing..eewww totally a disgusting act of me
u think u are a fashionista in ur own sweet world:) im fine with it

but u dnt have to give the look or later spread hates around me..because seriously i dont really took notice of u..

i dnt really talk about this topic even my friend bring it up to me a lot of times, i would say

"i dnt care, not worth"
this is just my point of thoughts of this undeniably stupid cheap crisis with no starting...

i just hope u are happy in what u are doing.

i just want to say i dont know u.

dush

2009-08-02T19:15:00.006+08:00

its funny its crazy .. u know how people name thing..
hahahha this what i fing living here in melaka:0

what a peaceful state to live in:0

its state "batang" or stick in eng.
hahhah abusive right?

glance.

2009-07-30T18:07:00.002+08:00

u always did that dont you?
and for me u r way too hot for a glance cant stop staring. hurmmm...
O-M-G
errr maybe there is a chance, or maybe thats y i think i choose u out of 3.. hurm

u give life for me in lendu..

junior

a mechanic.

yasmin ahmad

2009-07-26T19:35:00.000+08:00

how ironic, after a birthday post then a death post...hurmmm..
deepest condolences to family of arwah Yasmin Ahmad and friends affected.
she pass away at an early age of 51, after encounter a stroke/angin ahmar on Tuesday.

al fatiha

i always be practical in judging people, and let the work of a person speaks to me. and her work or masterpiece is one of a kind in a country such Malaysia, with our so called-conservative culture her work considered very not appropriate or considered abusive. but if we analyze or rather watch and understand her work with our practicality and realistic, open heart its is very interesting and contain a thoughtful messages.

she stand so tall in this media industry with her work, but higher power dnt like it, most of her work being censor or not published in this country. what a waste in a film industry. i trust the industry will be better in her hand but now his gone

but remember no matter what we do if its against the religion it is wrong.

takziah.

bday atul

2009-07-26T00:00:00.002+08:00

cuteness
happy birthday!

omg! its official its atul's birthday.
to Dyg Zainatull Aqma Abg Zulkarnain

happy birthday
stay hot, make it hot, keep it hot
its hard to be a person, when we are one lets be great!
my words-konon abg2 la ni
as we grow our responsibility grow too.
the most important responsibility is towards YOURSELF and family.

ur are the creamiest cream, to tango with me, coffee:)

good luck, will always love-hate you hehehehe
love u.
'we r family like a giant tree branching up to the sky"
from me,
ash, coffee

omg

2009-07-20T22:29:00.004+08:00

its been awhile since i updated,
its not i lost the loving feeling just busy and
i was sick for pass week but now im feeling better:)

so campus was out, due to swine=babi flu.. at last, but its still will burden us in future with changing of academic calender and we might not have study leave and stuff..hurm
it was a tough semester no more hard working u need super duper hard work and hard working team to go...

oh yeah dramatic part- so when i was really sick, until my temperature reach 40.3 degree and i was admitted to uitm clinic ward for 8 hours off dripping. to add the dramticness i was sleeping, and suddenly heard nurse literally screaming and look at my hand i look at my dripping and there were blood everywhere.. it just my dripping wasnt tight..huhuhu i know, and i dint tell my parents untill i arrive here,

tmmrw is harry potter day, with nay, qilla gill and athira :0 another fun day

lend_ me _doo

2009-07-08T22:19:00.003+08:00

omg yes! i am officially in lendu.. hurm its been 4 days here..!!!!!
been busy to blog way before that and now i have a chance!

just about 1 1/2 month ago, when i really missed lendu, not the place the peop and the situation. as i want to comment my senior rick blog and guess what the verification says "lendu" and i was like hahahahahahha omg hahahahha

so anyway, lendu is as always, with some upgraded look, like new paint new tiles. with trillion of peop who can make u vomit just in a glance of their tuutttt... junior was everywhere! they are 1800 i think OMG, and mass comm like 220 je..account 300 ok! arghhhhhhhhh

but whatever! i found the cutest and the "it" junior!!haunting time!!!waaaaaaaaaaa
anyway my lecturer this sem was great:)
but seriously the "It" junior is so hot!!!!even atul said "it"look like mechanic! wtf? i know

bel-madam shila, ctu- ustz noraini, photo- mr hakimi teoh, journ-rossalynn, graphic- mr. rusydi, psycho- madam ash, PR- ms Fatimah yazmin:)

hurmmmmmmmmmmm heaven help my heart!hahaha

i dk

2009-06-28T01:21:00.003+08:00

i dk, i just watched mj concert aired at 8tv just now,
i am really shocked and sad when i heard his dead, im not a big fan either, but there is something about him that shape me during my childhood, grown up with his music, and understanding the msgs...

its just sad u know, last time i really cry was when my late grandmother pass away.. the climax of my over act emotion is when he sang "heal the world" suddenly i just remembered when i was a kid, this is the song.. some how he make me realize that i should love the earth...

plenty of other songs too...im not a big fan, but his great, amazing and now im using the words suitably to describe him..its abig loss..al fatihah:)
enough, never, is

sista: tlg ambik report card
me: after 9, i hve class at 10 and satrt working at 1
sista: ok, tgu kat bwah
me: smbong tido zzzzzz
me: where is odi?
nek: school la
me: she suppose to wait for me, nk pg ambik report card
nek: ntah - at this point i m tired not enough sleep and super bz and hve to take the report card
so i went alone, because i cant wait i hve class, its sekolah agama ok...
so i found the class and its like super scary,
the first pharse came out from the ustazah"awak ni abg odi ek, model ke?"

i was like?huh n hahahahha there is no salam, straight away tnye hahahah
the ustazah really funny thank god:) she really make me felt a bit loose after the morning of chaos at home, with odi missing and do not wait for me.....and everyone at home and mama like dnt know anything:) so i know everthing la...????
life sucks sometimes, but its good...

good bye, king

2009-06-26T08:41:00.001+08:00

an incredible man...
Michael jackson..
good bye billy jean, good bye king of pop...
rest in peace

:'(

OMG! his too young...gone, but not in our heart...

f-lovers, later

u tell me

2009-06-24T23:58:00.005+08:00

i love myself:0

omg!
i miss my life...hahah weird i know, i mean i miss my social life..
even sometimes my social life means going out shopping alone or capturing fashion alone...
hurm been really busy... i dk what to blog anymore because my life is at its horizontal line moving but just there... boring...

anyway nay found me at work impressive, but still unfair because u asked nicole to help:0
ahhahah kelakar on how all of our friends related to one another its a big small world:)

anyway this cake was given by nay! all the way from setiawangsa to my house, on my bday!thanxx love ya..

to my crush, i know u are sad, i dk why i wrote this is not that u r going to read pun...:(
i should felt happy when ur relationship is in trouble, but i dk, maybe because that im that into u i felt what u felt, and i almost cry.hahahah-dramatic i know... i just hope that u r good. and ur fever is geting better and u r not infected with that influenza as u live singapore....hurmm.. im ur no.1 fan huh?
hahahhaha crazy..hotness:) sweet

p/s:i told my parents about my results, they are happy:) happy je la- means no gifts
la..hahahah
p/s:its been 3 nights i ate choclate cake! event here and there hahahah
p/s:i gain 3 kg..:0

oh ya. it is good

2009-06-21T01:07:00.002+08:00

work, still good, bored, and

its still hard to tell a woman that they wont fit the dress

none of it. sorry so i just let them try an love to hear their excuses:P
omg i love people:)

first day at class met two new models, Tehran-cindian goddes and ian-caucassian burman..
they r good, amazing i mean, excited...i screwed some steps

comments:
ur shoulder stiff
ur leg make sure it move-what tht suppose to mean?ahhaah
manly face when pose-fuck i get it
u r look more for formal fashion show- i take that as compliments

i hope everything is good.....
i need my incredible friend, NayNay i cant reach her...
:(
god give me strength

day of thousands drill

2009-06-17T21:47:00.002+08:00

"i'm a, a diva x3" ringing(i know its outdated, couldn't care less)- it was 4 am
fuck it what is it now? annoying, nk tido!

screen-'jejet'- my older sis
hello, police will call u and ask if u r my father and pls say yes
what r u into now?
cn u back me up?
sure- i always do and tired:0

7 am-ultimate stomach ache,
8am- laundry
9.30am-start ironing and a call,no not the police, it my former supervisor,

ash! can u start work?
huh?where? why? and i only free untill3rd july
nvm, we need u till then..
(thinking about hw much money needed to support myself, i took it)
so i start tomorrow, ash rejoining carven ong!and to that bitch, told ya , u wont be long with that dresses hahhahahahah

so thats it i got other job!!!another job i mean,hehehe

moment of crazyness, telling my mum, im going to leave laundry and start working...
she was ok, i guess, but i pity my bibik:(
she hve to work alone, gosh.. my mum need to do smthing! she dint have her leave for 3 months!!!

my mum was like 'mengade2, bukan nk cakap awal2, dah takpe habiskan semua gosokan!"
and i wasnt really care what she say u know, its just thinking of a burden that my bibik will carry if i left without completing most job, so i did like hell today and im tired!!f tired! most of the ironing is done!yeay! but it will start cumulating soon..

so now im juggling with my work at carven, laundry-which i will try to come anytime i can, and completing my modelling courses.. gosh and my social life-which already paused for few weeks:(
and preparing to start new semester!

crazyness, i always hve many things in hand to handle at one time..nvm i always do it, and i ve done great previously!!yeay

currently listening to, jolene by dolly parton btw the police dint call, i just hope everything is fine
p/s:my parents still dint know my last sem results, im waiting for the letter from uitm, lmbt nye!

gemini! begini bekini!

2009-06-15T23:16:00.003+08:00

i was born on 7 th june so i am a gemini!
let see what they said about me huh:

Some might say Gemini are an entanglement of paradoxes, but the truth is that Gemini have an easy acceptance of opposites

Gemini world is one of duality. Gemini can like this and that, one thing and its opposite.

You Geminis are curious, talkative, versatile and mentally active. Your mind can bounce around from one topic to another with great ease

Element: Air

The astrological element of air represents movement.

weakness:

Scattered-ermm kinda

Flighty

Gossiping-totally!

Difficult to pin down

Nervous

Superficial

Fickle-sometimes:(

Two-face-TOLD YA!

source:http://horoscopes.aol.com/astrology/zodiac-central/gemini

AHA!!!so thats me, i dnt really rely on these thing u know, but seriously what being mentioned above is 80%true.. just the strength/goodness of gemini i m not really sure cz i cant really judge myself..so yeay! so now u know me:0

to you:(randomness anger)!
i know we haven't met for 7 months but that is because u said u r busy, now i know what are u up too.."coaching someone personally" wtf? i dint get that! u know how much i love those things! will see, this weekend.. and u bitch hold on tight u wont be long on that dresses!

p/s:its not sex

and 1 more thing!!!i love this song, i dunno, i love it or it just keep me thinking of u..hurmmm its the words.."p/s im still not over you!"

[verse 1]
Whats up?
I know we haven't spoken for a while
But I was thinkin bout you
And it kinda made me smile
So many things to say
And I'll put em in a letter
Thought it might be easier
The words might come out better
How's your mother, how's your little brother?
Does he still look just like you?
So many things I wanna know the answers to
Wish I could press rewind
And rewrite every line
To the story of me and you

[Chorus]
Don't you know I've tried and I've tried
To get you out my mind
But it don't get no better
As each day goes by
And I'm lost and confused
I've got nothin to lose
Hope to hear from you soon
P.S. I'm still not over you
Still not over you

[verse 2]
Excuse me, I really didn't mean to ramble on
But there's a lot of feelings that still remain after you were gone
I guess you thought that I would put it all behind me
But it seems there's always somethin right there to remind me
Like a silly joke, or somethin on the t.v.
Boy it aint easy
When I hear our song
I get that same old feeling
Wish I could press rewind
Turn back the hands of time
And I shouldn't be telling you

Did you know I kept all of your pictures
Don't have the strength to part with them yet
Oh no....
Tried to erase the way your kisses taste
But some things a girl can never forget

confusion

2009-06-13T00:30:00.003+08:00

enough confusion with my life growing, now im kinda confuse at the thing that i was crazy about since i was small...
modeling, ok im too short...:(

anyway i went casting last Monday... it went good, i was accepted in, and now its me, i dunno im confuse, the low esteem part is coming out by questioning every thing and things with the agency- which is a bit unprofessional in handling their models... if u know what i mean..they r gay

but i think this might be my set up base before i went for better agency, part of learning, so yes i sign the form, and now, i will be attending courses, starting next saturday..insyallah things get better

btw, went out today, watch 17 again anddrag me to hell ..both are fun for me, 17 again was a bit slow for the first 20 mins, but then its ok...its great
drag me to hell, is scary funny, and fun...it was fun..i enjoy it..screaming laughfing disgusted and all.. omg fun..hate the ending i mean its not fair..

and its emirah bday today:)
happy birthday!!!!lucky we bump to each other at klcc today.. we gemini hot, so keep it hot.. :)

later:)

alhamdulilah

2009-06-12T01:17:00.002+08:00

alhamdulilah

first i want to express my gratitude to god,Allah.. with his bless i got in the dean list for last semester...congrats to me and others.

those are words i spill in this blog when my part 1 results came out..
now im in part two and im really gratefull that im in the deans list again, hope that it will continue in many years to come..pointer is going up..i determined to take it to another level and maintain it untill i graduated insyallah..

thank you: to my parents, my library mates, my groupmates, classmates and friends..
without u guys maybe this wont happened...

and this is my 150th post, and its a happy news..
thanx readers<3

yeay its my day

2009-06-07T20:19:00.017+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Im not as excited as when its other person birthdays but whatever, i always thought my bday fall at the wrong time in the wrong situation. anyway its been 4 days-OMG since i updated hurm i dunno, something just annoyed me.. much..
and its also my cousin wedding
i just want to say thank you very much to all who wishes.really appreciate the wishes and gifts-not yet. just hopefully soon u guys will understand

1 year ago

out of the bad day im having, being 19 now, and looking back what i hve done in my life, i am proud and im really glad i am at this stage.. thank you everyone who make it happened...no celebration.
im 19, sick, really sick, exhausted, literally broke and its my b'day:)

this is what i bought today, some of it is funny i know..huhu plus 1 more shirt from philosophy too and 1 sandals-which so good and im wearing it now.

vogue june? i know, its late tp why not, been busy.. and the trick 'one fith avenue'!!!!omg! and the weight gainer explain the mens health. and the ugly bandanas dapat free

and my bday cake in the making..my tradition of baking your own cake:)

and the rest my journey..:) lots of pictures..
love <3>

me n my blog celebrity my mum!haha

sista n cousin.

enjoying my sex

ash: peop hate it, he loves it

i know.

love gucci<3
randomness yg bodoh
we and the newly weds

me and my other family

squirting, my fav!!!
alone..and next time i wouldn't care

p/s:i m attending interview with shaunmodels tmmrw wish me luck
am i happy??not really...but thanxx to u guys...

me singing? never

2009-06-03T01:34:00.002+08:00

well i sing, like everyone does..but i cant sing!haha even some people say i look like amzing jaclyn victor-wtf right?

so what i been doing lately as i updated in twitter and all, is watching live performances by amazingly talented and crazy voice of a diva. mostly oldies diva, it just felt so wrong, for me not to compliment them...

1st, Ms Aretha Franklin

amazing, so good, great level.. watching her show make me feel how lucky am i, just have a chance to see and look at it.. greatness

2nd, Ms Jennifer Holiday

1 of my fav movie, is dream girls. as she is the original effie white, i was eager to see her performance and it is great..i m stunned.. the way she give to audience is amazing.."i cant put effie out of my life , which is sad.."-she said. which is sad:( if u guys wtched dream girls

next, Ms Cher

exactly weird greatness, she is fucking weird, but with her weirdness bring her up..love her..wish could see more of her..greatness!!!

there is a lot out there, and i just adore all of them who can SING! well some of my friend think they can sing..ouchhhhhhhh
and its my lovely bro bday, Heidy-how sweet
happy birthday, crazy.

horneymoon

2009-05-31T01:51:00.001+08:00

weeeeeeee so this semester destination is penang!!!! as am and lovely creame canceled earlier so only me and nay going from kl while lyss and raz waiting at the island...so its honeymoon between me and amzingly naynay! how sweet why not.

so honeymooners going by kononye airbus, how sweet we sleep we cuddle...ewww disgusting..hahahah no lar love u nay, but the journey even its 3 1/2 hour its great and beautiful amzing scenery.. and OMG we pass the most amazing paddy field..well i thought its amazing nay was sleeping all the way up...i know like wtf?

unfortunately the evil spirit dont let this two birds sleep together, they seperate us into two 10 mins distance house..hahahah i stay at raz house and nay at lyss house.. thanxx guys amazing!!!our hotel sgt

so the main activity is to eat!!! this does not nay happy, she kinda adventure girl..but we eat almost all speciality in penang accept for laksa penang, because we were rushing here and there and something came up..anyway we just follow our host-raz and lyss..

so we eat, take photo of amazing history and people, we meet new people/crush, we sisha

we bitch peop, we dont club-innocent kn?, nay shop, i dint get laid huhuhu we sisha!!
we went to the beach, we banana boat!-best gile

i met cuteness faiza, and missing am and atul.

we went to little india,-the smell the sound and the place is so india and its effin cool-i know atul gonna say 'feel like home ash?'

thanxx lyss

it was an amazing trip, with amazing people..and just amazing place, seriously if i would have to choose other place besides kl it will definately penang. the food cheap, the parking fucking cheap, no toll on the island, everything is near, not so jam. just great.. thanx raz and lyssa, and new friends:)

thanxx raz

on9 bday

2009-05-31T01:00:00.000+08:00

this is Herman,
his my friend in myspace from sgpore,
he claim im his no.1 fans, and its his birthday today!!!

so happy birthday...stay hot and keep it awesome..:)
i am ur no1 fan.. hahahahah
happy birthday

p/s his has a gf...

:( ):

i put up

2009-05-29T12:45:00.000+08:00

just arrive from penang yesterday, amzing trip with amazing peops, will update later...
so this morning as i woke up late arround 10, so i dint get to follow my mum to laundry early in the morning...
later she called home ask me to siap she want to pick me up.. ok, im ready...

horn!!!horn!!
she went out the car, screaming like hell abannnnnnggggggg!!! abang!!!!
screaming 'why u dint pick up the phone, if u dnt want go im nt coming...
i want to shut my lappy so i scream tunggu kejab!!!
then she scream again and again i open my door and scream tunggu lar!!!
then she like 'u scream at me?'
and i was like im just telling u so u understand....
wtf she scream like im her slave or something, i just ask her to wait for 2 minutes...

so she left the house without me.. making me the bad ass hole son againn..
seriously i put up with her nagging ,
i put up with her bicthing,
and all her screaming too.

dady bday

2009-05-27T01:47:00.000+08:00

happy birthday dady!
thank you and stay healthy for us..sure stay hot too
sorry i was in penang, well u in jb nway so i dnt know about present, sister should take care of this one.. uuhuuhuu

sick

2009-05-24T22:22:00.000+08:00

im so sick with everyone,
most of a person that i get close too, bring something up,
im frustrated, irresponsible friend, selfish friend, making big deal of something arghhh

my mum is crazier than ever,

and tmmrw im going to penang...
how cool is that.

dnt look like u have fuck me or something!!!

whats happening?

2009-05-21T00:23:00.000+08:00

list of things that is happening to me in time:

watching night at the museum tmmrw!
meeting up school friends-omg, scary
going to Penang-excited:)
making more money- penat!
lending money to friends- pleased :)
trying to be fat, i mean fit, for the next months interview with agency
preparing self for cousin wedding-excited, it will be the first among us cousin
buying new dslr-my dad dapt diskaun!! but still using my own money
working somewhere else-not so sure
trying to get collection photo of me- nay help shot me! for portfolio
taking driving license- hopefully jadi
i hope i got through the interview!
and my nenek reach kl from us week ago, without my fabulousity perfume

and birthday!!!!-mine is coming!omg im not ready:(
happy birthday to shafiqah bt sah ismail-crazy classmate girl, stay hot

and to my baby, nabila mahfuza, OMG! u r growing huh..shes 4

she just broke my pefume today! arghhh and dnt know to say sorry, benci :(
happy birthday nway(the left one)

'sarong party boy' is back!!!!-www.myspace.com/ashboy1

once, rented

2009-05-19T23:01:00.001+08:00

there are people in past keep bothering my mind.
it was someone who used to live with us at my house, in my room once..and also the next room

its when we siblings not even 8 there were me and my sister and newly born younger sister..
at that time, house was so empty, we were kinda unstable economically, so my father rented two room in my house to outsiders, for maybe rm 250,-that was about 15 years ago....waaa i was 4.

1st room-my room now
rented to a married couple, troubled married couple. they always fight in the room and we try to stay put of it. but when things get worse we have to step in. he beat his wife, his wife, crying but just stood still, my mum said she was so in love with that guy...im quite close with her. she very pretty, and lovable, just hook with the wrong guy.. i always try to hear their fight and IT WAS horrible!! it still in my mind..later they move out, and keep me wondering what will happened to her...
time passed, till last year, i just got back from school, eating,
taxi stop in front of my house, called my grandma, she went out and hug my grandma, we pay for the taxi...this woman was traumatized, fear, and joy when she step in our house..she said he kick her out, and slept with other girl in the house.. it was horrible..she was in horrible condition, imagine 15 years with all the abused..i bet non-stop.... so yes this keep me wondering,till now, how is she? she went back to her house, i felt so useless.. i hope u r fine :)

second room-my sis room now
a guy, mysterious, very soft spoken, work all day and at the same time studying. fair, nice and sngat pendiam... he dnt talk much.. i dnt really know him though, we called him abg rizal.. the room door always closed.. and i always wonder is he okay inside there? is he dead? or pass out.. but he went out just fine,- u know 4 year old imagination...
one day i got to enter his room, there was amzing batik paint on the table, and i accidently colored and ruin it..hahhaha sorry, he was with us quite a time my mom said, he cant the fighting from the couple, or maybe he moved because i ruined his batik..no because he completed his study an decide to head hometown and start a career.. so there he go...
untill one day, i was just started blogging, and got a new follower- iqmal, so i check his blog, and found one blog and i follow that blog because i find it intresting.. and that blogger,commented on my post..when i check my email, it says "i think i know ur mum, and i used to rent a room at ur house,..." and i was like omg! its him,- famous malaysian designer, rizalman ibrahim.
hahahahha- so im nt the 1st designer from that house lorh..hahahah

my mum told me, 'memang lar die designer, dulu die keje batik malaysia, umi antar die naik kete buruk merah kite tu hahahhaha' i said he kirim salam, and my mum send the regards and really glad to hear from him. my mum asked to send email, i did but there is problem, and i cant send, yes if u r reading this, umi cakap, she really glad to hear from u, dtng lar rumah raya nanti.:)

thats it! these people is in my early memory as a kid, so its flashing back.
my new blog is coming in 2 days!

dralimema

2009-05-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

drama and dilemma,
drama at home, seriously my mu was so crazy, i dnt know why, i dint go to laundry today and she making big deal out of it, im like...wtf????? they are making as in its a big sin for me not to go... what about days that i went to laundry huh? one day, why???
and everyone is against me,

i went out with my bff, ieda and leysa to express my emotion, well they help a lot, and at last i know, why i am acting not as me in front of my family...it was fun guys, miss ya...
and yeah i saw, 3 amazing guys, they were crossing road,
they said

we r not in the desert...
what day is today...-right after we are talking about what day is today in malay!!!omg

which i dnt know why, but they are making me super jealous, their style is amazing i am feeling so down that i malu to ask permission to take picture for my new blog- i will tell the details, when its published...

and the dilemma about penang, two have canceled, and yeah i am frustrated.:) but me still going..

unpacked hols

2009-05-15T22:06:00.000+08:00

this things , happened way behind the date of this post, just im to busy and lazy to update it..
it was when me and campus friends went out to melaka.. it was fun!! the journey was amazing huh after our bus get raid by the jpj for using photostat road tax-stupid i know..stupid for riding a bus too..adventure, they said.but i had fun:)

it Took 20 mins from our journey huh

wolve-me-rine!

the movie was amazing, cant resist to scream and squirt when the movie playing. Hugh was effin hot, so do gambit but still cant belief will-i-am play a role! 41/2 star!! for someone who love xmen!

well the picture tell the story, even after this day that some of us break up-which i still dnt know and find clear reason of it...annyway it was fun guys and missing u guys like hell.. as much i want to go back to kl, but as i m here i think i want to be with u guys in lendu more.. it just not a right time to be in kl hurm..

bonjour!

after i wash my laundry from campus, i still unpack my stuff, it still in the lugage bag!hahaha my room was full of clothes, and i think i wont un-pack it cause my closet wont fit, nway my mum promise to buy new closet for me 100 years ago..but still, i wasnt really hoping :)love you guys!

she won!

2009-05-15T00:57:00.000+08:00

am i excited? huh?
not really because i love aminat because she is extremly gorgeous, the body, the lips and the eyes..yeah not the nose. but aminat so weak in pictures...

nway, teyona won!!!! i am emotionless, after viewing the runaway i think she deserve it than alison!!congrats..
fuck holidays, eyh2 can we quit from family????
i know my bad.. im quiting from the laundry, because the more i work the more i dislike mother, its unhealthy u know..
btw, a fight happened tadi, i won..

me-my womb, we have issue

2009-05-12T19:17:00.000+08:00

my womb-my mum ...again right.. i felt like this since i squirt my own sperm, in other words, teen. hurm i guess everyone does,(its worse than yours amz) but idnt know its the pressure,

ok tday, as you guys know i am helping my mu at her laundry. when i am free, or when she thinks i am free.. so as he said she is sick,tired and force for my pityness to help her during this holiday, it just second day of me spent time at the laundry and there are already issue.. normal my ironning skills, she will check and question all my work, i mean i ve been doing this for fucking 4 years!!! i the only person who have professional guidance to iron thing, but she questioning me! you dont even iron your children uniforms!!!!!

plus she just let us dry in this hot hole of uglyness- the laundry, without proper food, she will ask my maid cook, and my maid will cook tempe, and sup sayur, everyday.. i will die soon...

wateva, we still have issue!!!

girls pack your stuff, and guys pack ur abs, we are so going to penang!!!
as much as i hate lendu, i think there its more peacfull..
i dnt want to spend the whole 2 months here!!!

amazing

2009-05-10T12:33:00.000+08:00

it was an amazing ride for part two...
will miss every moment..even its satrted so slow without much drama, but it ends with amazing drama huh...
fuck im so excited to get back like in 2 hours, but guess what plan change, my sister picking me up, and i have a bad feeling about this,
i mean she is still sleeping now..
like wtf??? my roomate semue dah balik im all alone!!!!!!!!!!!!111

fuck!!!!
but still excited to get back to kl, for 2 months!!!!best nye...
im done with lendu, well not really...

t.care all, hve fun this break, and ajak me to spice the fun..
will miss ya..

messy-me-dia

2009-05-07T19:00:00.003+08:00

OmG
mass media alhamdulilah tidak sukar seperti yang disangka...
hurmm.. 2 toughest subject dh over, now tgal ctu this saturday and bel this sunday..

so after exam,
(i wanst in mood-not enough sleep)
my friends ask me to go eat with them at MSL.
which i dnt really like, but i just went because they all look at me and give me the 'annoyed look'.
there, i wasnt really comfortable because it was lalat every where and i complaint to all some agree and some do the look again...
well sorry lar its just my feed back towards the message send by the lalat...
lendu=lalat :(

and sequel of my bitch atitude that day, that bring my friends temper up..
fine... but whatever i malas k...
girls and their drama is sick..

shoe loaf <3

2009-05-04T20:59:00.000+08:00

omg just love it...
best nye if im not here and can grab all this...here as in malaysia czuse this brand not in kl.. hurmmm
tu je...
'keep' ss09 collections..
thanx terence sambo for keeping me updated...

the last D.

2009-05-03T12:12:00.000+08:00

I am now officially not a member of D anymore :(
welcome new chapter of C.

its my class for next semester, after drastic move from several of classmates D away..
i somehow forget my intention to move and stay at D..
just for the sake of loving the class, i dnt like when other influence come and took over..
plus heart that will hurt if i moved...

even i stayed at D,'
coordiantor decided at last used her autocrat power to just move people around so, i am moved to C group.. after all it does not matter because i came here to study...
good luck everyone facing the day next semester!!!

human comm was fun, scared to death of mass media subject!!!
help:@

classical comm

2009-05-01T22:10:00.001+08:00

what? what?
its all in my mind today, as tmmrw will be our part two paper-human comm,
i am so nervous and scared. now im 70% really ready,20% okay thang, 10 % not sure thing and will work on it..insyaallah
i been study for the last two week, tmmrw will be the penentu..arghh scary..

here, i want to say good luck to all who sit for finlas, my class mates, and anyone who took any paper right now, scary weyh...
good luck2!!!:)

another thing that also playing in my mind is the class shuffle thing,
i heard that, well i dnt know why, but i heard people who are coming into my class.
and there is a pattern of people who want to enter our class..and im kinda dnt like some of it...
in short this whole shuftle thing is kinda sick..
the technique which is freedom to choose which class, is not really not good
i prefer dictator because people wont complain and accept the results..
hurm..
i dunno just hope for the best..

wish me luck and again good luck
missing my bro,
suhaidi aka heidy :*
his in penang, errr i know lar his fairer, because his half brother..
:)

attending desire

2009-05-01T03:29:00.000+08:00

so yesterday,
i went to ceneleisure for the sales, with naima alone,
most of my friends cancel.
but wateva we rent a car and went there and reach there by 11.30,
we are not sure of the road so it takes time,

nay: omg ash!
me:beratur je!!

it was like 1km line, and i like at the 500m,
we reach quite early as the sales start at 11am...

after 1 sick hour of complaining of people way of dressing to this events and how junior in front of us kinda annoyed me, and how my hgh school senior is so hot- he was there, and yeah counting how many gays arround (not impresive 15 je) and sempat view notes human comm..
hahaha

in there it was completely pack, trillion of shirt everywhere!!!
it was great deal for woman, mens not really cz agak ckt..
i get my self zara coat, dutti shirt and tie, pull and bear jeans, and naima bought some stuff..
the queing for paying is another thing hurmmm.....

i get what i want and love it..
thanxx to naima, and friends.....

my advice:
go early, go with someone-who cn quee while u shop, go its a good deal, rm239 pants for 39.90
hurm well mostly lar...
fuck im tired :)

the sales!

2009-04-29T03:05:00.000+08:00

i know,
its fucking weird to talk about shopping at this point and even what to wear to the library tmmrw but this thing is crazy!!!

lyssa: i got this mesg( bout this sale)
me: i know i want to go.. i know it earlier
lyssa: jom nak?
me: on!!-

without thinking the paper is on sat and the sales is on thurs
seriously but never mind it just take our 6 hours!!!
hahahah we will rent a car and went..

well i get the info earlier last 2 weeks from a friends
that the zara and it network, pull and bear and massimo dutti is having their clearance sales!

welcome2!!! all..jom, its fun and u never regret it...
its at cinileisure damansara!!!
30 april- 3th may!
10 am...

i felt guilty, but i dun know

icons

2009-04-27T00:59:00.000+08:00

hurm its been a while since i shout my view bout fashion thing,
hahhah its not my expertise, but just something that i like,
icons is someone that u look up too or admire.. and for me world wide icons when it comes to fashion are Audrey Hepburn, Andy Warhol, and maybe some views famous designer as their icons.

i love audrey, i look up Marlene Dietrich and stuff but here are some once or maybe till now very famous fashion icon

Tina chow,she is american-german-japanese mixed, was a top model, and a socialite married to entrepruner of chows restraunt network .. she always appear stylish and admire balenciaga and dior..this is balenciaga

the unique thing is she died at age of 41 because of aids..she actually having an affair with a bisexual designer..and make her the first hetero woman to die because of aids in 1992.
how cool huh?? hahahah
eyh2 u guys heard about the rumours that hiv actually never exist???the expensive drugs actually the one who killed the patients..but im not sure, i just heard

another girl was anitha pallenberg,
she was a very goldie hawn beauty big eys, nice skin, nice blonde hair and stuff.
a wife to a rolling stones, keith and also an amazing designer and actress
she is still alive hahhah appearing in andy warhol's factory make her famous!
hurmmm basically she was seen as an icon because of her relationship with keith rolling stones and how rich she was in buying clothing and learning all sort of stuff about fashion and there she was!!!

the most admirable people in fashion for me is madame coco and now karl..they are amazing!!!
funny thing in my mind lar kan, i always said when we walk through gucci house i will say "my life is complete when i hold gucci on my hand(silent moment) and yeah also completing haj!"
hahahah seriously.. love gucci!!